Lessons about living-What I’ve Learned.

This off-topic post is something that’s been germinating in my brain for a while now. Most of us have our own set of internal rules that we count on to live happier, more productive lives. They can be big rules, like “don’t sleep with a married man” or smaller rules, like “add some oil to your boiling water to prevent the pasta from sticking.” Whatever level of importance they come under, here are some of my own personal rules–things life has taught me that never let me down when I follow them. Some of them come from my Daddy, who had a huge cache of wise life lessons that he was kind enough to teach me. I never forgot them, nor will I ever forget him. So Daddy, this blog post’s for you.

1. Your marriage is a third entity in the household, almost like a third person with a pulse. This person must be cared for at all times, and they come first in all things–before you or your husband. If you treat your marriage like a living, breathing essence, you will have a very happy marriage. I promise. This third entity is what makes saying “we” so much more natural than saying “I.”

2. Never take sides when a couple–married or not–is fighting. I guarantee you that at some point you will lose both of them forever.

3. Do not pay heed to what people say. Instead, look at what they *do*. You’ll learn a lot more and be fooled a lot less. Words are easy, actions are not.

4. Ladies, if a man is truly interested in you, he will knock down the telephone–hell, he’ll knock down concrete walls—to get to you. Stop making excuses or rationalizing bad or disinterested behavior. See rule number 3.

5. There is no such thing as a “victimless” crime. There are always victims—some are just harder to see.

6. Believing in something bigger than yourself and your own intellect–whether it’s God, Buddah, Jehovah, or a higher self , is essential to stay grounded and sane. You are not the center of the universe. Remember that.

7. If you want something to remain a secret, tell no-one. This may seem like a no-brainer, but you’d be surprised how many people violate this simple rule and get burned.

8. Women of a certain age should not continue to have jet-black hair.

9. If you make a promise to someone, keep it. You’ll sleep better and will be believed the next time you give your word. Your word is precious, treat it that way.

10. Do not select art because it matches your paint swatches or couch. Choose it because it makes your heart sing every time you look at it.

11. You will never regret using fresh garlic instead of garlic powder in any given recipe.

12. Anybody who doesn’t like cats doesn’t know cats.

13. Money does not buy happiness. But you can rent it.

14. To clean pet urine from your carpet, soak it up with a gazillion paper towels, pressing down hard, until most of it comes up in the paper. At some point, the paper will stop turning yellow. Then clean it with a mixture of white vinegar, soap and water. The smell will be gone.

15. Say “I love you” early and often. You will never regret having said it, but you most assuredly will regret having not.

16. Anybody who says “what?” can hear.

17. Purple is not just a color. It’s a way of life.

18.  I see nothing virtuous in rising early. Some people do their best work in the wee small hours.

19. A true friend will support you in your major life choices even if he/she strongly disagrees with them. When it’s more important to be “right” than to be a friend, the friendship is no more.

20. Living in the past or future is a false life. Living in present time is the only path to true joy.

-to be continued